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Dear Grand Master Hafner,
Thank you for this outstanding newsletter – another example of the partnership you have formed with parents. The values you teach and more importantly demonstrate are an outstanding compliment to the values we as parents try and teach and live with our children.
I would like to take advantage of your ‘time to share’ and offer and relate a story that exemplifies the values my son Josh has been learning and acquiring.
Riding the elementary school bus can be an overwhelming experience for children in the younger grades. Kindergarteners, first and second graders are sometimes subject to the harsh behaviors and actions of the older children on the bus. They witness or unfortunately may be the subject of teasing, aggressive behavior and out right ‘meanness.’
With the help of the confidence and self esteem Keith Hafner’s program instills in our son, he has been able to manage situations that have arisen so far. The point of this story, however, goes beyond his personal situations.
There is a rather good sized 5th grader (call him Dan) on the bus who is a neighbor and a friend of Josh’s. Josh, who is a 1st grader, and Dan respect each other, even given the age difference. There is another boy (call him Eric), a 4th grader who is also a friend of Josh’s.
It came about that for whatever reason Dan began mercilessly teasing Eric. Dan would sing very mean spirited songs about Eric. He would get others to join in. Dan would sit behind Eric on the bus and pester him. Dan would follow Eric home from the bus poking and shoving him. This happened on maybe three distinct occasions.
Obviously, Josh knew this was very wrong, but unfortunately, he also knew that this is the way kids sometimes behave. When the teasing did not stop, Josh, who is very fair minded, kind, and respectful to others, decided it was time to take action to stop it.
One day recently after Dan had started a group of kids on a teasing song about Eric on the bus ride room, Josh got off the bus in a hurry to track Dan down. He passed by his mother who was walking to pick him up, telling her he needed to talk to Dan.
She stopped and watched Josh catch up with Dan half way down the street. As Josh tells it, he firmly questioned Dan about his giving Eric a hard time. ‘Dan, why do you keep bothering Eric? I know you’re a good guy, and so is Eric. So what’s going on?’
Dan, who really is a good guy, said he was just having fun with Eric. He liked giving him a hard time. Josh told him it wasn’t right. He told him it was obvious Eric did not like it.
On a couple of occasions Eric was almost brought to tears. Josh told him he needed to stop it. Dan seemed to feel bad about it, apologized to Josh and told him he would stop.
At 6 ½, Josh had the self esteem, confidence and ability to confront a 10 year old about a situation he felt was terribly wrong. The older boy also had the respect for Josh to listen to what he had to say and agree that what Dan was doing should stop.
The values Josh learns and practices start at home and are strongly reinforced by your program. In this situation, Josh clearly demonstrated the self esteem, confidence and strong sense of right and wrong that he has developed through the partnership of his parents and ‘Keith Hafner’s Karate.’
Frank and Shawn Preissle, Ann Arbor
